A real valentine brings people together, especially lovers, on a level, honest playing field.
That being said, there has been a bombardment of ads and features on TV, stores, newspapers, and the www, all purporting to know the perfect gift for your loved one, and they just happen to have it available. One perfect gift featured on a local program was a diamond studded bracelet for only $1000. If you don’t give this to your loved one (usually a woman- wife, fiancee, girlfriend or lover), poof! goes the love. If she isn’t worth that much, then there is this beautiful watch with interchangeable bands for only $500; and if that is still to pricey for the one you love, get a Pandora bracelet for about $30, and the charms begin at $25 each. Of course if you do this, then you have an inexpensive gift available for next year provided you have the same lover next year. Of course the jewelry people tell you that nobody likes flowers anymore, and the florists have the perfect bouquet for about fifty bucks (forty if you go to the firehouse in Guilderland.)
At any rate, it appears to me that most of the ads pitch things that the man gives his woman so she will continue to love him, as if love can be bought. If it is so, and all this buying is necessary to maintain love, then Valentines day is not for lovers, but an opportunity to buy superficial affection, as if any woman would be fooled by such nonsense. Valentines day could be very, very divisive if the right gift is not given at the right price. Did I just hear the flapping of the cupid’s wings go out the door? That darn Grinch.
Personally, I am a firm believer in courtly love which has high expectations of lovers, especially in the areas of fidelity, longevity, for better or worse, etc. For me and my love, every day of our married life is Valentines day. Fortunately, we agreed on that early in our marriage. So where is the romance? Where is the love? If the world is really celebrating love on Valentines day, we will celebrate, and we do. We do not have outlandish expectations like we may have at Christmas. Rather, we have dinner together, something special in house, light some candles, music and enjoy the love we have. Some times, we will go out to dinner. We have a drink to our love, have a nice entrée, and a decadent dessert. We are both happy, satisfied and have been deeply in love for over 40years. No avarice, no guessing, no stress. Viva l’amore.
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