A Formative Experience

I was about 8 or 9 years old when probably one of the most formative experiences of my life occurred. It happened when my brother, sister and I had our tonsils out, and I am sure they are saying, "Not that story again!"  (If you want that story, go to http://philpalladino.com/Health%20Care%201940s.html . It is a good one.) But the formative effect of the story is really important.

A night nurse or aide, exasperated by repeated requests for water from my brother who occupied the bed on the other side of a wall in the ward (she fulfilled all those requests), refused to make one more trip to get water for me who was dying of thirst, barely able to utter the word "Water!" The words, "He'll just have to wait until morning!" hurt so deeply, but also helped me be the kind of person I am today, and in retrospect, I am thankful for the negative learning.

I got over the thirst the next morning. Lots of ice cream and ginger ale soothed the hurt in my throat, and my voice came back. I didn't die, although that night, I thought it was over.The physical part was easy to heal. I was able to joke about the experience forever, and get good laughs as I perfected the story.

Now in my advanced middle age, I think back and realize the full effect of that experience. I find that I can never refuse a request for assistance from someone in need. I can not say "You have to wait." I may say, just a minute. I might ask for forbearance for  a short time. But I do not refuse to render a service to someone in need.

As I care for those I love, I think of that terrible response from that unknown caregiver, when my heart sunk into despair facing hours of thirst. And somewhere along the line, I decided that is not the way to treat people, and I resolved that I could and would do better. And maybe I do.